Wednesday, March 21, 2007


If both partners bring Jesus to bed with them,
does that make it a three-way, or a four-way?
Pudinhand Wilson

Chapel of Love – The Crystals

In American football an “Ave Maria” is a long, last-second, desperation-motivated, forward pass that hopes against hope to turn impending defeat into miraculous victory.

Probably Anthony Buono had something else in mind when he named his Catholic “dating” service Ave Maria Singles, although the masthead sort of reinforces the football analogy.

The home page features this half hearted endorsement from a guy who looks like he’d much rather burn than marry.

I think members are supposed to be looking for marriage partners as opposed to casual dating. I wonder how AMS screens its applicants.

There must be plenty of Lotharios out there with a particular taste for sincere Catholic females, who find that “There’s something special about a practicing Catholic…”

The welcoming letter concludes thusly:

... Grace and peace of Christ to you in your search.

Sincerely in the Holy Family of Nazareth,
Anthony J. Buono, President

Mentioning the Holy Family kind of throws a wet towel on the passion aspect of marriage, considering the Catholic belief the Joseph and Mary never had sex. Great model!

As pointed out in the Jesuit Watch post A Marriage Act, a marriage is consummated only through sexual intercourse. For a couple that has never had intercourse to say that they are married is a lie.

In some weird way, these contradictions must contribute to erotic tension.

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bereal said...


Anonymous said...

The forward pass you mentioned is not called an "Ave Maria"; it's called a "Hail Mary". Yes, I know Ave Maria is the Latin translation of Hail Mary, but no one in the USA ever calls it an Ave Maria.