Monday, January 23, 2006

WHO IS PUD? -contact

Pudinhand Wilson, we call him “Pud,” is my best friend, I don’t care what anyone says.

We grew up on the same block, same age, same physical proportions, same interest in sports.

The best day in my life was when Pud and I admitted we were gay.
Pud is endowed with a mystery-money trust fund, “but not well endowed” Pud wants potential suitors to know.

“It’s just enough to keep him out of the workforce,” his grandmother used to say, “where he could only fuck things up.”

Pud’s gandma is the scariest person I’ve ever met. His family was in the bail bond business.

When asked why we aren’t boyfriends we both give the same agreed-upon response, “Because his cock is just too big.”

Pud saved my life once and thinks I should kiss his ass for eternity--what’s mine is his.

I contend the opposite. I was about to pass through the pearly gates into eternal bliss and I was snatched back. For what? To listen to Pud’s bullshit day and night?

I say Pud owes me.

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

puds a bummer